swords

Algebra 2 test, I am ready to die
Can't hear a bloody echo but the screams in my mind
And I wish I could say sorry for my thousands of crimes
You're wearing Dad's old shirt to sleep and it's all only a lie

I'll come back alive to write on my grave
"Defender of the gossips and the kids who weren't saved"
I was the little girl who cared when you cried the night away
They're spitting venom at my heart, but it looks like lemonade

(I'm sorry)

Last year took a turn for the worse
I made it out alive, or so say the newspapers
But no one really asked, so I can't be all that sure
No one asks the questions to which they're sure they've got the answers

She dried his flowers and they're left in my room
'Cause I couldn't say goodbye, it all happened too soon
Steven's coming down the steps to comfort me and you
We're crying blood straight from our hearts and I think it's still pumping through

(It's over)

"Emily, it wasn't you, let it go," says the mob
But it's hard to let it go when someone else still holds on
Hard to imagine, isn't it? That the sword is still drawn
And I still feel it all over because the past isn't gone

Someone help me, my mind's a scary place
I know that she's gone, but I can still see her face
I'm blacking out now in the shower and I've got to escape
Because my brain still holds against me what I cannot erase

(Don't hurt me)

My older brother, and he isn't alright
But you figure no one is when you step into the light
We're hiding scars and silhouettes of the struggles in our minds
You wake up from another nightmare and they tell you that it's fine

Someone find me, someone find me today
I can't breathe in this ocean of unwanted space
I know they think that I am occupied from miles away
But I am begging for a lantern in this season of gray

(Please wake up)

And I won't see my sister at Fuze tonight
They tell me I'll forget, but it's branded in my mind
I'm just here to care about people and then be left behind
I wish that they could see the world from my set of eyes

Love, I don't know why you read this blog
I promise one day I will learn just how to move on
But I can't focus and my head is still saying there's something wrong
And I'm trying to be brave, but I'm not all that strong

(I'm sorry)

I'm doing chemistry instead of going to sleep
Someone remind me why I'm doing this, please
I'm coughing all night, a metaphor, I can't breathe
I just want to be loved, now my brain cannot see

And I try and I try just to get it all through
And I toss in my sleep 'cause I'm thinking of you
Where's my reason to live? I got lost in the moves
I hope Isaac can't hear me sob from his room