I curl up on the wood instead of the carpet

Because my aching limbs tell me I can't stay here indefinitely 

And so says my chemistry 

Lying uselessly on the kitchen table

Playing the part of the rain that causes the landslide 

Because rain would not destroy a stable foundation 

Yet my mind is a mess, so my heart found destruction 

It's not like I'd be alright if I had no chemistry 

I just might not be in the fetal position on my wooden floor

As I type this

Hunger gnaws on my stomach

Helps to distract from thoughts like

Why do I keep hearing Wonderwall on the radio?

And I hope I make a decent grade on my test tomorrow 

Also, I wonder how often she visits him at the cemetery 

Baylie better not be taking a walk by herself in this lack of sunlight

I wonder who would show up at my funeral--

I suppose by now I have defeated the purpose of my hunger

Since I write about my nagging thoughts anyway

What's the point?

It always comes back to that question

I hate to see people I love in awful situations

Especially if person a is hurting because of person b

And vice versa, mostly 

My life is a constant cycle of not being able to rescue people from their own house fires

And then attending their funerals

Believing I could have tried harder

"Because maybe

"You're gonna be the one that saves me"

He did say "maybe," didn't he?

(Another brutal thought)